This is a four-part series post of a skit about Judgment Day. The question which will outlined through the skit and asked at the end is: "What does God look like?" It also inadvertedly asks questions like what is the basis for trusting documents written thousands of years ago? What religion holds "the truth"? What can be considered reliable data nowadays? And first and foremost, how would religions (especially Judaism, Christianity, and Islam) fair in court?
This skit was written as a real question, laying out the most basic logical debates and questions that many people have asked. It shows the rational for science and provable methods to be employed in religious thought.
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The idea of a "Judgment Day" is prevelant in MOST all religions. And too, most of the religions liken "judgment day" to court.
So. LET'S GO TO COURT!
(Don't worry if this makes you mad. No one ever likes going to court.)
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[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] Court Session #777, the case of Religions vs. Logic: [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] BAILIFF: All rise for the proceeding of this court, on this day, Wednesday, February 14, 2007. Today the Honorable Judge Melissa will be presiding. You may have a seat. [/FONT]
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[/FONT] [FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Today we will hear the case of Religions vs. Logic. In fairness to all belief systems, there will be no Bibles, Torahs, or Qurans to swear upon. I have given this a great deal of thought. And since there is no consensus for one absolute truth, it has to be this way: [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] In my court, the witnesses will be sworn in to testify to the best of their knowledge about their sincerest beliefs based upon this realm which can be experienced by our five senses: sight, sound, smell, taste, and touch. Testimony will be subject to the rules of what can be observed through those five senses. Anything which cannot be proven through laws of science will be considered hearsay and subject to dismissal. [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] (Pause) [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Using precedence of history and prevalance, Egyptians, please call your first witness to testify to the existence of Amen-Ra. [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] (Silence) [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Is there no one here today to testify as a witness for Ra, having seen him or her physically with their own eyes? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] (Overheard from the jury: "I saw his picture in a museum once.") [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Then we will proceed to the next listing on the docket. Jews please come forward and present the evidence for the foundation of your faith please. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] (An elderly Jewish man stands and recites: I solemnly swear, to the best of my ability, that the testimony that I am about to give is true. I understand the reasoning of this court and will respect the laws of nature, science and all things provable.) [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: (Stands proudly and smiling) Your Honor, I present this document as evidence of our faith. It is the Torah. It was given to us, the Jews, by god, at Mt. Sinai approximately 3,000 years. We believe that these are god's words. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Thank you. You may approach. This will be submitted to the court and listed as Exhibit A. Please continue. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: (Coughing softly) We, the Jews, were once in slavery in Egypt, which can be proven today on existing tablets from that era. And, around 1313, b.c.e., we were led out of that place by our leader Moshe. We roamed for decades. And during that time, we, the Jews, were given the Torah. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: (Interjects) So, . you were there when the Torah was given? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: (Automatic response) Oh yes, of course. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: (Chuckles) How old are you? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: I am 51 years old. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: That means you were born in the 1950s. But you said that the Torah was given 3,000 years ago. How were you there? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: We, the Jews, believe in reincarnation. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: Ok. but do you REMEMBER being present when the Torah was given? [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: What do you mean? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: Well, for example: do you remember who you were standing beside at the mountain? Do you remember what songs were played? Do you remember what your name was then? Do you remember what you were wearing? Do you remember what time of day it was? [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: You see, it is not like that. We were there in spirit. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: So, you cannot testify to what you actually SAW or HEARD then, correct? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: Uh, well, uh [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: Let me remind you that this is a court. One plus one does not equal fifteen. Therefore, if you cannot prove your case, then the court will move to strike. [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: Our leader is Moshe. It is documented in Egypt that he lived there and did exist. And later, he wrote the Torah. [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: Wait. I thought your god wrote the Torah. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: Well yes, but there is some debate among Jews that maybe Moshe was the original author. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: Ok then. Your Honor, I call Moshe to the stand. [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] (Silence) [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Where is Moshe? (Another silence) Bailiff, find out if Moshe was properly served papers to be present today. [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] BAILIFF: Your Honor, it appears as if the sheriff tried to find him, but was told that he is deceased. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: So, Moshe is dead. Ok Counsel, do you have anyone else to call as a witness? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: No, Your Honor. Everyone is dead. And the Jews cannot remember what they saw or heard. or if they were really there. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: I object! [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Overruled. Defense, do you have any other witnesses or evidence that you would like to submit? [/FONT]
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[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: Your Honor, I would like to submit these documents of historical evidence of our first and second temple. [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: You may approach, and these will be entered as Exhibits B and C. Counsel would you like to review these for your comments? [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: Thank you, Your Honor. (Pause) It does show that there was a building, but this does not prove a deity at all. Nor does it prove that the Torah is gods words. [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: This is an outrage! I know that my god is god and that the Torah was written by him. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Defense, I dont think I need to remind you that this is a court of law. You will control your outbursts in my courtroom. Furthermore, in light of this case, I will remind you that, while in court, substantial evidence must be shown for proof. And thus far, you cannot call even one witness who can testify to what they saw or heard. As far as this court is concerned, all evidence is circumstantial. Now, do you have anymore evidence to present or witnesses that you wish to call? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JEWISH DEFENSE: No, Your Honor. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Then please step down. Bailiff, can you call the next religion on the docket? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] BAILIFF: The court calls the ancient Greeks, who will testify for Zeus. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] (Silence) [/FONT]
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PROSECUTOR: Excuse me, Your Honor, but it is my understanding that the ancient Greeks could not make it here today, because they are all dead. And furthermore, I would move to close this particular case, because--even though there is proof of buildings to their deity--Zeus is no longer worshipped. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Thank you counsel. The courts move to strike the case against Zeus is granted. What is the next religion Bailiff? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] BAILIFF: "The docket lists Apollo. Who is Apollo?" [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: "The court calls Apollo." [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] (No answer) [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: "Bailiff, who comes after Roman sun-god?" [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] BAILIFF: The court now calls the followers of Christ to come and defend their claim. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] (Broad, tall and confident, a man approaches the clerk and recites the court's creed, smiling.) [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Defense, I hope you have a better argument than the first man. What evidence can you provide the court today? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: (Adjusting three-piece suit and juggling a Bible) Your Honor, we Christians believe in the Holy Trinity. We believe that god came down in the form of a dove, which was his spirit. And that spirit dwelled in the man who was known as Jesus Christ. He was crucified and resurrected. His words endure forever. Here in my hand, I submit the Bible and our New Testament as proof of his existence written by Jesus disciples. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: You may approach. This evidence will be tagged by the court as Exhibit D, please hand it to the counsel for review. Counsel, do you have any comment? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: Yes, I would like to call a witness, Your Honor. The court calls Paul, the apostle, to the stand. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] (Silence) [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Bailiff, was Paul, the apostle, notified of this trial today? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] BAILIFF: Your Honor, attempts were made to reach him, but we were informed that he is dead. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Counsel, your witness cannot be used, because he is dead. Do you have another witness? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: Was the court able to notify Peter, John, Mary, Matthew, or Luke? [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] (Judge looks to Bailiff) [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] BAILIFF: Your Honor, all those people are dead. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Thank you Bailiff. Counsel, are there any LIVING witnesses that you would like to call? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: (Snicker) Well, Jesus is living. [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: Alright then, I would like to call Jesus to the stand. [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] (Silence) [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: (Sigh) Bailiff, was Jesus informed that he had court today? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] BAILIFF: Your Honor, Jesus was not found either. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: Counsel, please approach the bench. Listen, please keep in mind that this is court, without all the snickering and semantics. This is still court. I want you to present your case with evidence that can be observed with your FIVE senses. Do I make myself clear on that? [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] PROSECUTOR: The court cannot find anyone who is living to testify to the claim that Jesus ever existed. All we have are texts from dead people. No one, with any creditability, has come forward to say that indeed they have seen Jesus. [/FONT]
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[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] JUDGE: (Sigh) Defense, what evidence do you have? Is there anything that you can provide the court today to substantiate your claim? [/FONT]
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[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: Your Honor, I have millions of people just like me that will stand up and say that they have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ in their hearts. And I can say that I have felt the overwhelming power of my god in my life. [/FONT]
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PROSECUTOR: So you have MET Jesus? Can you tell the court what he looks like then? How often have you spoken with him? Where does he live? Whats his address? [/FONT]
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CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: Jesus is in heaven with the father. And I contact him through prayer. [/FONT]
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PROSECUTOR: Do you hear an audible voice response? [/FONT]
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CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: Ur no, he speaks to my heart. [/FONT]
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PROSECUTOR: So, you have never actually gotten a voice answer? [/FONT]
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CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: No, ur but he does answer my prayers. [/FONT]
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PROSECUTOR: Give the court an example of an answered prayer. [/FONT]
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CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: Well, about three years ago, I was unemployed. Then, I went to church the next day and prayed for a job. Come Monday morning, someone offered me to come work for them. [/FONT]
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PROSECUTOR: Had you applied for that job beforehand? Or did the person know that you needed work? [/FONT]
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CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: Well, (cough) yes, I suppose I had applied for the job. [/FONT]
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PROSECUTOR: Then how do you know it was an answer to prayer? Are you saying that a person cant get a job unless they pray to Jesus first? [/FONT]
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CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: Objection. [/FONT]
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JUDGE: Overruled. [/FONT]
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PROSECUTOR: Has there been prayers that were never answered? [/FONT]
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CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: Of course. [/FONT]
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PROSECUTOR: So, praying is like gambling sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. [/FONT]
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CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: I object. That is the spirit of Satan. [/FONT]
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JUDGE: Overruled! Sir, I understand that you truly believe in that deity, but this is a court; and we need some proof that you are telling the absolute truth. Feelings and emotions are not proof, Sir. Do you understand that? Validity does not come from a vision while rolling around on the floor. Can you provide this court with a witnessone who can be sworn into court todaythat will testify to having seen Jesus or whoever you claim as god? [/FONT]
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CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: Your Honor, Jesus was seen by his disciples and thousands of other people during the time of his ministry. Here is the documentation of those peoples own accounts. [/FONT]
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JUDGE: I understand that, and you can keep those documents. Sir, what I need from you is evidence right here and now. Peter, Paul and Mary cannot be sworn into this court for testimony today, because they are dead. And I will not argue the legitimacy of historical records. [/FONT]
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(Silence) [/FONT]
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JUDGE: Defense? Do you have anything else for the court? [/FONT]
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CHRISTIAN DEFENSE: No, Your Honor. [/FONT]
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JUDGE: Then, you may be excused. (Sigh) Bailiff, who is next? [/FONT]
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BAILIFF: Your Honor, the Muslims. [/FONT]
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(A devote Muslim man, wearing the traditional Islamic garb comes forward and recites the court's creed.) [/FONT]
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JUDGE: Defense, as I am sure that you are aware of after listening to these arguments today, that all I require is some tangible proof of your claim. What do you have to present to the court? [/FONT]
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MUSLIM DEFENSE: Your Honor, we, the Muslim nation were brought together under the umbrella of Islam by Mohammed, peace be upon him. He gave us the revelation from Allah in the Quran. I present the holy writings into court as evidence today. [/FONT]
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JUDGE: Ok I have had enough. Keep the writings in your hand, UNLESS you can prove it is even worth the courts time to read it. [/FONT]
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MUSLIM DEFENSE: The Holy Quran was recited to Mohammed, peace be upon him, by Gabriel the angel after he ascended into heaven. [/FONT]
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JUDGE: Is that all you have? [/FONT]
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MUSLIM DEFENSE: Isnt it enough? The beauty of creation and Allah is contained in this book. [/FONT]
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PROSECUTOR: Your Honor, Mohammed is dead too, and unless the Muslim can provide the court with a witness that SAW Mohammed ascend into heaven, then the court moves to close this case as well. [/FONT]
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JUDGE: I agree counsel. This is getting old. Defense, can you provide even one single witness who EVEN MET Mohammed? [/FONT]
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MUSLIM DEFENSE: Your Honor, Mohammed, peace be upon him, lived over a thousand years ago. No one alive today ever met him. Besides, he was just a messenger for the divine word of Allah. [/FONT]
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JUDGE: In other words, what you are saying is that you cannot provide any substantial evidence into this court to support your claim other than hearsay documents from someone that is dead. [/FONT]
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MUSLIM DEFENSE: It is much more than that. Allah is real. He created the universe. Just look around you. You can see the work of his hands. [/FONT]
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JUDGE: I am sure the Christians and Jews would say the same thing about their god. The only thing religion has proven so far is that a lot of people believe in a god of some sort. [/FONT]
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(Pause) [/FONT]
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JUDGE: "Defense, step down. I plan to address the jury for a moment." [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] Do you see what a mess this all is? The people don't even have an unique text or deity to swear by in court? That is why the witnesses had to be sworn in using the laws of nature. It was the only remaining consistancy.
[/FONT][FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] Yet not one of them can claim to have observed with any of their five senses to have seen, heard, tasted, touched, or smelled God. What am I to believe? [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] Were these people not warned against serving gods that cannot speak and cannot see? [/FONT]
[FONT=Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif] Deuteronomy 10:20~21: "Remain in awe of God, serve Him, cling to Him, and swear by His name. He is your praise and your God, the One who did for you these great and awesome deeds that you saw with your very eyes." [/FONT]
Didn't take the time to read it. The premise is faulty. What we can exprerience with our five physical senses and what we can wrap our minds around defines neither the parameters nor the impetus for spiritual activity.